Wednesday, August 6, 2008

Spice up your sex life- it's all halal!

http://www.ctv.ca/servlet/ArticleNews/story/CTVNews/20061203/islamic_sex_061203?s_name=&no_ads

Need to have more programs on this topic- I have done some of this kind of a workshop - and there is a demand for it- my website on allexperts.com has some of these too. Chemistry between two people happens on different levels and marriage doesn't guarantee all of those always.

Hence the need to connect with each other away from some of the roadblocks of intimacy- kids, non dressing up for each other, lack of travel together, lack of not doing community work or adventurous chores together, endless exposure to others, the syndrome of comparisson, etc. suggested ways of help- a counsellor will also suggest much these and the Sharia covers lots of ground under mubah foreplay:

Seek a getaway

Purchase lingerie's for her- give hints

Have candlelight dinners- soft music in the backgroun- if you're into that

Enjoy sexual conversations and jokes in privacy

Open communication- search where are each others erogenous spots

Look for each other turn-offs and turn-ons

Ensure the sex is spontaneous sometimes

The man must smell good, dress up and foreplay the wife more than just a slam down event!

The wife must seek creative ways of massaging, kama sutra or perfume garden helps in this lots!

Sexual exploration is an open field- I mean a huge open field except maybe anal sex for some Ulama- so never stop surprising each other!

Books and other media exposure helpsor even discussion groups as removing inhibitions is a educational process that needs cooperation from society.

Lots of taboo on sex has to be cleared by the Ulama-endless stuff in peopels minds that parents and others said is haraam or bad but its not!

2:223 Your wives are as a tilth unto you; so approach your tilth when or how ye will; but do some good act for your souls beforehand; and fear Allah. And know that ye are to meet Him (in the Hereafter), and give (these) good tidings to those who believe.

Tilth represents the preparation of one's garden and in this case the foreplay and even the afterplay and romance that comes with sexual territory. Time and patience are crucial to making sex appealing and creative.

The Prophet hated when men would jump like beasts on their wives and he warned if you donot dress for each other and look attactive then adultery will be your lot.

Looking at each other naked, oral sex and romantic spa moments all fall within the mubah and allowed grounds of preparing the tilth- so never stop oh gardeners of love!

Do you know Aisha, may Allah be pelased with her, bathed with her husband, on whom be peace, in the same bathtub and she would recite love poetry for him and he would for her? Do you know she would run races with him and kiss him each time he leaves home?

Enjoy!

Tragic demise of Akbar is al ost to all Guyanese and humanity.

Allow me to share my deepest sympathies to the families and friends of the late Akbar Alli of Logwood. This tragic ending of a young husband and cold blooded ruin of a father of two young souls, resonates a terrible pain that sits undigested in the souls of thousands, who know him and who don't. I am far way from home but can still see that smile on Akbar's face.

Having known him for almost fifteen years, as he moved from Bush Lot to study Islam at Zeeburg, he temporarily stayed in Enmore by his aunt along with his friend. He later married and lived in Logwood. Having run a trucking service for years, transporting sugar workers and recently selling scrap metal, Akbar has always proven to be that ambitious hard working young Guyanese, who will stay and make the best of any halal venture. He's such a loving person that anyone can get help from him and no matter how much you may anger him or be preachy he would respond with a sweet smile of gentlemanness. While he did not build the nearby mosque in Logwood, he definitely contributed immensely to its present form and substance. Akbar you will surely be missed. And his closest friends were not only Indo Guyanese- visit his mosque or his home-service and you'll see.

Snuffing out his life is indeed senseless and animalistic. While the family mourns and many try to awaken from this life-altering shock, we are left with more questions than answers. Yes, as Muslims we say it's his time. We find solace in the fact that death is pre-calculated and everyone has to leave on his appointed time. Yet the heart will not accept easily, in the thick of grievance, the tragic death of a son of Guyana, who has always lived with love and peace, being charitable and managing his business the best way possible. Imagine the terrible sadness his kids will grow with? Of course, we pray they all receive closure soon. What about his lovely wife who stood by his side, in good and bad, being the perfect choice of his love? She witnessed it. The money was taken, so why shoot him? Handing these mindless robbers the money is the right thing to do rather than life, but that too seems not to work.



The irony of this happening at the vicinity of protection and him expiring at the threshold of life-saving adds to the mental turmoil. Will better security of transporting large sums of money be implemented, scrutiny of elements at financial stores and easier access for businessmen to be licensed be looked into? This lost has indeed united the communities, as people of varying religious organisations rally to engage in Akbar's funeral. But will pressure be put, with that united voice, on protesting the further decay of security and respect of life? How many have to die before the excuse of deportees and limited resources will be thrown out? I have to mourn, as much as I have to seek grace when I think of these murderous loose canons. Just as Muhammad forgave the marauding Quraish or Jesus let go of the Pharisees, I'm sure Akbar's place in Heaven will make him let go vengeful hate , that seems to serenade every conversation. However, this does not mean justice and security will have to be compromised and the pains of this grieving family have to be balm with the downpours of oblivion.

The present drama out of Toronto called Sweet Karaila jettisons us into the deeper knowledge of what happens when callous individuals seek quick gratification without respect for anyone - not even family and life. It also reminds us that the myth of racism is as week as Eldorado and its seeking. Hope Guyanese gets to see it when it comes to Carifesta and take heed- that crime has no colours. Yet how much condemnation have we received, how many are working to heal, and who is willing to educate our people that crime doesn't pay.

May the families find patience and the deceased rest in peace. May the police be guided sooner and grace storm our nation. Last year another brother was gunned in Corentyne trying to save his son from robbers. Today he's semi paralysed and the community seems to move on, forgetting these victims are our our own sons of a magnificent contribution. But who cares? To Sister Romeena, Hajji Hyder's grand daughter and Akbar's wife: love is powerful and your life with him was well worth every drop of it. Once there is life there is hope. The Quran says in 5:32 "On that account: We ordained for the Children of Israel that if any one slew a person - unless it be for murder or for spreading mischief in the land - it would be as if he slew the whole people: and if any one saved a life, it would be as if he saved the life of the whole people. "